M&M’s Drops Spokescandies for Maya Rudolph, Cites ‘Polarizing’ Reaction to Candies’ Shoes

Just in case you needed more proof we live in the dumbest of all possible timelines, M&M’s are dropping their spokescandies after backlash from Fox News and other (mostly conservative) commentators, replacing the anthropomorphic chocolates with Maya Rudolph.

The spokescandies first appeared in 1954 in black & white advertisements, eventually evolving into the Red and Yellow (representing the plain and peanut varieties) characters and soon joined by others, including a female Green M&M in high-heeled boots and a flirtatious personality meant to capitalize on the urban legend that the green dye contained an aphrodisiac.

In Jan. 2022, Mars, Incorporated announced they were restyling the M&M’s logo and the looks for their spokescandies — mostly changes to their shoes — to be more “inclusive,” as well as giving the female Green and Brown characters “more prominent placement” to achieve “a little bit more gender balance.”

Fox News host Tucker Carlson was one of the most vocal critics of the redesigned spokescandies, panning them as “deeply unappealing and totally androgynous.”

Another marketing campaign launched at the beginning of this year again drew fire from the right when the candy featured packaging with only their female spokescandies, printed upside down with a slogan about “supporting women flipping the status quo.”

The Daily Wire’s Ben Shapiro dropped a rant mocking women as “guzzling down” M&Ms while they were “lonely in your apartment with your wine and your cat” and asked if the all-female packaging would “cost 77 cents on the dollar” of the regular prices. Fox News anchor Martha MacCallum criticized the packaging as emboldening America’s enemies and a ridiculous move that would be cheered by China.

The over-the-top critiques drew mockery from late-night hosts and on social media — perhaps most amusingly when Chasten Buttigieg tweeted that Fox News should “Go yell at an M&M” in response to a report criticizing his husband Pete Buttigieg’s paternity leave — but the company seems to have grown weary of people worrying more about the spokescandies’ footwear instead of just enjoying the dang candy.

On Monday, the official M&M’s Twitter account posted a message to America announcing their spokescandies were being dumped in favor of Saturday Night Live alumna Rudolph.

“In the last year, we’ve made some changes to our beloved spokescandies,” the message said. “We weren’t sure if anyone would even notice. And we definitely didn’t think it would break the internet. But now we get it — even a candy’s shoes can be polarizing. Which was the last thing M&M’S wanted since we’re all about bringing people together.”

“Therefore,” the message continued, “we have decided to take an indefinite pause from the spokescandies,” announcing they would be replaced by “a spokesperson America can agree on: the beloved Maya Rudolph,” who they described as being able to “champion the power of fun to create a world where everyone feels they belong.”

Mars might have found some comfort in the fact that Rudolph is not a prolific social media commentator.

Her verified Twitter account has been mostly dormant since 2018, with about one tweet a year (responding to Vice President Kamala Harris enjoying Rudolph’s portrayal of her on SNL in 2019, wishing Dionne Warwick a happy birthday in 2020, etc.), and nothing since a May 2021 reply about the Disney movie Disenchanted, in which she played a supporting role. Rudolph’s Instagram is an anodyne collection mostly consisting of photo shoots from her magazine covers and her outfits at various awards shows and events.

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